I have learned that no matter what at some point some time there is a change in my friendship due to our special situation. We call it the “friendship honeymoon phase”. It isn’t malicious or planned, but it happens. No matter how hard I try not to come across with the slightest envy or jealousy, it happens. No one knows exactly what it is like to live our lives except us as it is the same with me knowing how their life is too. It is the simple fact that we are all human and are far from perfect. What do I mean exactly? How many times does someone want to hear, let alone see it with their own eyes that we will forever be taking care of our child, that is extremely difficult for some to understand and the few that see it or get it are such a blessing. For example: Innocently many times I am in the midst of a conversation about the couples only trip, empty nesters and the one that gets me all the time is “we just let the kids fend for themselves and we go off to bed”. That uncomfortable feeling they get when I may be discussing our future and they realize that will never happen for us. It isn’t their fault, nor do I want pity on the fact that we have this challenge. It is by far the hardest thing we have endured and the challenges change as the years go on. What we have learned and how we have grown from it will always outweigh the challenges. Personally for me as an example I can only be around a person who is negative about everything in life for so long, so I see how things change as realizations come to those around us. Every friend that we have ever had always holds a special place in our heart and lives. We learn so much from each of these friendships we have had as I know each of those friends have learned so much from us and what we bring to plate.
No one should ever feel sorry that they are doing those things and we can’t or won’t be able too. We should always be happy for others when they are enjoying what life brings them. After all life is a journey, not a competition.
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